Xichen’s sudden rise startles him, Guangyao shrinking back like a wounded animal. He stares, wide-eyed, and then frowns.
Slowly he rises as well, folding his hands in front of him, fixing Xichen with a cool, disappointed look.
“What does it matter? I could stay here for a hundred years, flogging myself, repenting. You wouldn’t believe me anyhow.”
He’s quiet for a moment before looking away almost dismissively. “The closest I have ever been to my true self, to being happy and content, was with you. But you won’t believe me. You refuse to see me as capable of regret or redemption.
And I do regret. But even if I say such a thing, you don’t believe me.”
Guangyao bows his head, rubbing a hand over his eyes, confessing softly, “That is my fault, I know. What I do not know is how to change it.”
But he turns away then, as if he’s the one to decide this conversation is over and Xichen’s welcome has been overstayed.
no subject
Slowly he rises as well, folding his hands in front of him, fixing Xichen with a cool, disappointed look.
“What does it matter? I could stay here for a hundred years, flogging myself, repenting. You wouldn’t believe me anyhow.”
He’s quiet for a moment before looking away almost dismissively. “The closest I have ever been to my true self, to being happy and content, was with you. But you won’t believe me. You refuse to see me as capable of regret or redemption.
And I do regret. But even if I say such a thing, you don’t believe me.”
Guangyao bows his head, rubbing a hand over his eyes, confessing softly, “That is my fault, I know. What I do not know is how to change it.”
But he turns away then, as if he’s the one to decide this conversation is over and Xichen’s welcome has been overstayed.